Healing.... The beginning

9/7/11
  
As I said I spent a few days in the psychiatric hospital. If I could explain how interesting it was I would. But that might take me a few days. There were all kinds of people in there. Most of which were drug addicts going through treatment. There was one young girl in there who hijacked an EMS vehicle. Everyone laughed about that. It was a little like jail, you ate 3 meals a day at certain times. There was nothing else. If you didn't eat it was too bad. You didn't get anything to drink except at meal time, thats when you got iced tea or fruit punch. Otherwise you could have water for the rest of the day. We all looked like water addicts. Everyone constantly carried around a plastic cup with ice water. I never drank so much water in my life! I guess it kept you from feeling hungry in between meals. We were locked in. And we were watched all the time. I'm glad I don't smoke. All the smokers were so funny. There were set times for a cigarette break. I think it totaled 4 times a day. So if the staff was running late on opening the door, we would have some very restless people. It was so funny to watch. Anyway, it was such as I don't want to go back there. But on one of the days we got to go outside for one of our sessions. The same lady who spoke to me about letting the guilt go, was the one conducting this session. It was so awesome. We all sat at picnic tables and focused on our surroundings. She wanted us all to be silent for 10 minutes and just listen. We had to listen to nature. There were birds singing, the wind was blowing gently. The sun was shining. It felt great! Her point to that was SIMPLE THINGS. If everyone could stop for a moment and just simplify their lives, even if it's just 10 minutes. We would all be better people if we just took a minute and breathe. We all are so caught up in our lives that we get overwhelmed. Does anybody remember to stop and enjoy simple things? Like the breeze blowing, or the birds singing, or our childrens laughter. These are totally free. There is no cost to do any of these things. But there is a heavy cost for not doing it. It's called stress!!!!! I was so caught up in the life I didn't have that I was forgetting to live the one I still had. This can apply to everyone. Life is made up of moments. those moments come and go. How many have you missed because you didn't apreciate simple things? I personaly want to appreciate the simple things in my life before I miss it. It doesn't mean I don't still have stress. I do. Life will still throw you a curve ball or two. But I am trying hard to work on how I deal with that stress. The day I got released from the hospital was one of my happy days. I missed my husband and my kids. I couldn't wait to get home and sleep in my own bed. I couldn't wait to see my little rugrats. I wasn't able to see them while I was there. It was so good to be home. It was so good to be alive!!!!!! I'm glad I didn't die. But this was just the beginning. Because now I had an appointment I had to stick with for follow up therapy. I wasn't looking forward to that. As I said I had some aweful therapists. But this time it would be different. And thats where I leave off today. I want to thank all of you again for reading and for your comments. I'm doing this for me. But if it helps any of you than I'm so happy. It's a difficult life I have had, but we don't have to be defined by what's happened to us. It's how we choose to go forward.